I am once again joining Lisa-Jo Baker for Five Minute Friday. I am sad to hear that Lisa-Jo will only host this one and next week and then she is “finishing” with Five Minute Friday, but I was glad someone (Kate Motaung at Heading Home) is taking over. I have grown to love the Five Minute Friday writing experience! This week’s prompt is “Finish”. Here goes…
I am bad at finishing things. I consider myself to be an idea person more than a producing person. I have some great ideas, but I often don’t execute them too well…or at all. I have big thoughts, but little follow through on a lot of things. So, “finish” is a bit of an intimidating prompt for me. But, as I spoke about in my birthday post yesterday, I am trying to show myself some grace and let myself off the hook for some of that lack of follow through. Because instead of following through, I have just been getting through and that was all I could do for a while in my life. There was a LOT to get through in the last five years. And I haven’t been very good at giving myself time to just be in it. Or to just escape from it, as the case may be. So, instead of focusing on finishing things in this post, I’m going to focus on things I’m finished with. (And yes, I ended that sentence with a preposition…I’m showing myself some grace and not going back and editing it.)
I am finished with feeling like I’m less than when I can’t please everyone all of the time. I have a lot of people in my life who I have viewed as “making me feel guilty” about not being around enough or not doing enough at work, etc. But, really, I need to realize that it is ME who makes me feel guilty, not them. They feel what they feel, but I am the one who feels what I feel. And sometimes I make mistakes or overbook or just think I’m going to be more social than I can really get myself to be. I have to be okay with that. And often, it is disappointment in the other person that makes me feel guilty, but instead, I should feel appreciated and gracious for having people who want to spend time with me and my daughter.
I am also finished with being mean to me. I consider myself to be a kind person to others, but I am often mean to myself. I am harsh on myself. I don’t ask for help from others even when I obviously need it. I often try to do it ALL – work stuff, home stuff, medical stuff, fun stuff, etc. and all of it just gets to be too much stuff. I need to be kind to myself and say its okay to get overwhelmed and ask for help. I always appreciate it when others admit their vulnerability and ask for help, but I don’t let myself do it with others. I need to be nicer to me, forgive myself more often and ask for help when I need it.
Done…so, there you go. That is what I’m finished with (among other things). What about you? What are you “finish”ing?