This week’s truths are a few:
Anxiety and depression are depressing. I think I’ve said here that my mom went into hospice care in late January. Although they have tried a couple of different drugs and started her on another one this week, her anxiety and depression are pretty severe right now. She will call me crying about things that are obviously nothing to worry about, but that are driving her crazy. The meds are giving her tremors (or maybe she is just getting them due to weakness?) and she is constantly depressed about that. It is difficult to talk to her and now I’m going to spend the weekend there this weekend. I honestly think this may be the last Easter she is alive, so I feel like its important to spend time with her when I can. In addition, me staying there allows her to go without paying for 24 hour care for the time I’m there, so it saves her around $700 since she pays a little over $200 a day for care. Finally, it just makes her feel more comfortable. Not happy. Not at peace. But, more comfortable. So, why not? It certainly isn’t going to be a joyful weekend, but it will is important to do.
Memory is a crazy thing. Realizing that our six year old has no recollection of things that happened when she was three or four years old, because those memories are so vivid in my own memory. Tonight we were reading Yoko by Rosemary Wells (she is a huge Max and Ruby fan currently) and I told her that Rosemary Wells also wrote Noisy Nora, which she watched on DVD from the library over and over and over when she was three and four. She had no recollection. She used to laugh and laugh whenever Nora knocked anything over. We found the video online and watched it again and she did not find it nearly as funny, nor did she remember it at all. I’m not surprised because I don’t have any memories before the age of five and then there are only a few memories when I was five or six or seven. I don’t really have complete memories until the age of eight or so. But, it is strange to actually watch those memories disappear for her. Interesting article about childhood memory and who remembers more of childhood and what influences it. Turns out, I’m pretty normal.
That’s all I have for today. There are more truths, but I don’t have time or energy tonight to talk about them. Enjoy these – and comment with any truths you have for today!