Stewardship, Uncategorized

Hard Resetting Life

luca-bravo-217276-unsplash
Photo by Luca Bravo on Unsplash

School has begun for my daughter.  I start teaching on Monday and continue at my second school the following week.  Our schedules are already filling up.  I am beginning to feel a little stressed out already.  Although our house has gotten much cleaner over the past few days, it is still not where I want it to be.  Although I joined Terrafit at the beginning of the month, I have not been following it for the past two weeks.  Although I want to be eating more healthy, I am not.  Although I want to be walking the dogs each day, I am not.  There is so much in my life and although it seems like incrementally changing would be easiest, I feel like I can’t take the time to do that and even if I had the time, so much of it is related to the other that to make serious changes in one area, I need to change the other area.  So, I’ve decided my life needs a hard reset.

A hard reset, also known as a factory reset or master reset, is the restoration of a device to the state it was in when it left the factory. All settings, applications and data added by the user are removed.  –Whatis.com

So, what does that mean to me?  Well, I’ve added a lot of data as the user of my life over the past five decades.  Not all of that data is good or useful.  I need a restoration to the state I was in when I left the factory.  When God sent me to this place, He had all the settings I needed, but I wandered off the path and started getting new applications and gathering data.  And as the saying goes, Garbage In, Garbage Out.  I’ve got a bit too much Garbage to deal with at this point, so it is just easier to restore to God’s settings.

So, what does that mean moving forward?  Well, first, it means living life with a sense of stewardship.  I was listening to an episode of the podcast Woven last week about stewardship.  It is part of a series and I haven’t finished listening to the series yet, but it made total sense to me.  God has given me all these great things.  A home, plenty of food, friends, my family, a great hometown, not one but two good jobs that I enjoy, access to technology, and so much more.  And I don’t take care of those things the way that I should.  Instead, I am constantly seeking more or better or seeing the lack or the mess.  I am tired of living life that way.  Instead, I want to recognize how blessed I am and not take that for granted, but instead steward those gifts from God to the best of my ability.

So, I’m hitting CTRL-ALT-DEL on my life keyboard and looking more deeply at what my factory settings were.  I’ll have to dig out the owner’s manual (Bible) and see what it has to say about starting over my system and keeping it healthy and happy this time.  Luckily, my factory producer is forgiving and full of grace, so I think He will make this hard reset a little easier.

What about you?  Are you keeping your system well-maintained or do you need to clean some data and applications out in order to steward a better life?  It is a question worth asking!

Life Updates

Inspired…and Fired Up…

I read a post earlier today over at Recipe in a Bottle that has inspired me to come back to this blog.  I keep starting things and not following through on them.  I don’t want this blog to be another one of those things.  So, I’m back.  I’m still in my forties and still wanting more.  I am also still failing on a daily basis.  But, I can still work towards it.

I’ve accomplished some good things this year.  I’ve taken on some new projects that I am really enjoying.  A course redesign that not only brought in some extra income but has also renewed my enthusiasm for teaching.  I took on the troop leader role for my DD’s brownie troop and have been exhausted by it, but in a good way (usually).  I have realized a few things that I want for myself and am willing to work towards.  I’m still a financial disaster for the most part, but there is a light at the end of the tunnel, with credit scores improving, an inheritance that should be finally dealt with in the next six months or so and a pretty significant raise as well as the prospects of selling our place without taking a huge hit (we will lose a lot, but will not be cash short in the sale).  Overall, things are looking up, if not immediately, at least in the near(ish) future.  My hopes are to pay off most of our debt and be able to live within our means from here on out.  There is no reason we should not be able to do it.  It is just a matter of getting our footing before trying to climb up.  At least that is what I think.

I have also realized that I am not doing nearly enough of what I WANT to be doing in life.  So, I’m really trying to figure out how to make that happen.  I’ve realized a few things about myself in the past few months.  Coming as a surprise to me, I think I am an introvert.  It seems strange because I do speech and debate and I like to talk to people.  But, I’m also exhausted by it.  Teaching is one of my favorite things to do, but it also is exhausting because it requires a lot of dealing with people.  But, I love what I do, I just need to realize that I need the quiet time alone as well.  I am never going to be one who really loves to go out with a bunch of people all the time.  I like watching TV and reading. And that is okay.  I spend time with people for much of my life because of what I do professionally, so I don’t necessarily need it personally.  I mean, I have a small group of friends that I get together with every once in a while and that is good for me.  I have realized that.

I have also come to the conclusion that I need to clear house.  This is not a new realization. I have known for some time and I’ve been gradually clearing things out here and there, but I want to get more serious about it.  I feel like there are constant piles piling up…everywhere.  And even though I’ve unloaded a bunch of stuff, I feel like there is so much more stuff to go.  I want my house to be pretty, but simple.  I want to own the things I use on a regular basis and that is it.

So, there you go.  2016 is coming to a close.  I’m ready to continue the changes I’ve made and I’m ready to keep writing on this blog.  I hope you’ll all be good with that!  Thanks to anyone who is still reading after all my silent weeks…

 

Six Word Saturday

Six Word Saturday – Uninspired

 

To-do list is short, inspiration too.

I officially turned in my final grades for Fall 2013 last night.  And now, I feel relatively uninspired.  Part of it is that I am spending the weekend (which is glorious weather-wise) at my parent’s house.  I had to take my mom to a CT Scan today so the doctor can check if the Tamoxifin they put her on is working to keep the tumor growth down (she has had multiple bouts of cancer and the chemo is failing to do anything so she is now just on Tamoxifin).  I am staying here through Monday because she has the follow up appointment with the doctor then.  So, I’m here in a somewhat depressing house (my dad is in hospice and is not doing very well – there has been multiple times that we have been told he won’t make it through the week, but he keeps holding on physically, but he is completely gone cognitively) and my mom has an infected tooth so she is relatively miserable on top of all that and I probably will have to take her to the dentist on Monday morning as well.  So, I am feeling less than inspired.

I have things to do – prepping for my Spring classes, doing some work on this blog and networking for the blog, cleaning up my computer files, reading a book (trying to read more in 2014), etc., etc.  But, none of it sounds the least bit interesting or compelling to me at this point.  The sad thing is I have only 17 days before school starts again, so some of this really NEEDS to get done right now.  In addition, I should try to get out and enjoy the glorious weather we are having.

So, I need to find some inspiration.  I am glad I’m able to come and help out my mom but I wish the house wasn’t so dark and depressing right now.  I want to be happy and celebrate the fact that I am done with grading, but I’m just feeling blah.  Hopefully, tomorrow I will feel better about things.